The Obituary Of Manchester United: A Lure Of Ginger

Like the Roman Empire the fall of Manchester United will be studied for centuries to come. The decline occurred not when David Moyes, seen as an Incompetent Caesar took charge, but rather in the era of Sir Alex Ferguson. However, in the decade that followed he would be referred to as Alex the Bungling.

The Beginning Of The End – The Middle.

Alex the Bungling allowed his ego to destroy the greatest United midfield, which he’d forged from bright-eyed youth. Those purged included Beckham, for wearing a skirt. Keane for paranoid fear of a threat to his leadership. Them and many more (Stam, Ruud et al) chased and hounded into the gulags until only the YES men remained. Having purged he replaced with inferior quality. Between 2005-12 only two central midfielders were signed: Owen Hargreaves and Michael Carrick. 

Youth however was available. Most prominently in Ravel Morrison and Paul Pogba, however when the opportunity arose, the Emperor didn’t like his new clothes. Instead he panicked, shuffled and burrowed through his wardrobe, where he found his most favourite and comfiest of jumpers. However, once vibrant, now the ginger had faded and tired. The Emperor, who had once backed youth, no longer had his faith, and the youth players no longer trusted him for opportunities. Paul Pogba now played for the Old Lady, and won awards year after year, and a Ballon D'or in 2016 for guiding Juventus to Champions League glory. Ravel Morrison went to West Ham and played himself into the England squad and shone brightest in an ultimately hot, humid and humiliating campaign in Brazil 2014.

Sperm War

Ego. Alex Ferguson had lots of that. So did J.P McManus and John Magnier. They also had a 28.8% stake in the Red Devils. Rock of Gibraltar, worth £3.5 billion in stud rights, was the sperm both parties yearned for. The war started in 2004. And in a complete coincidence, The Irish Horse Mafia, sold their shares to Malcolm Glazer in 2005. Would they have been so premature in selling their shares if the sperm war hadn’t turned sour? Ferguson claimed victory. His ego satisfied. But at what cost? Glazer sucked £21 million a year out of the Stretford End in interest to service the debt alone. The Theatre of Dreams lost its leading man: Ronaldo. Oh how they cried when once they cheered. Yet, Ferguson never questioned the Glazer's business model. Again, in times of desperation, it was the lure of ginger where Ferguson found comfort and solace.

The Abdication

Alex the Bungling surprised no one with his retirement 12 years after his first attempt. What did startle was he didn't u-turn. Historians in decades to come debated how it could have all been so different if he'd gone in 2001. The Glazers would never have been able to knock on the Old Trafford door to find a semi coherent pensioner ready to be shafted with commissions on the commissions. Youth players would have been blooded rather than mistrusted as Alex looked for instant success before the end came...And then it did, and Alex the Bungling had hand picked his successor - David Moyes. In the moment of pending crisis his retirement would bring he went for his security blanket. Yes, David Moyes is ginger! Coincidence? COINCIDENCE. Rightly or wrongly Alex the Bungling trusted ginger men. This was irrefutable fact.

Complete Destruction

Players purged. Youth players discarded. Financial security forsaken. Champions League qualification missed. Top players left in the summer of discontent. Their replacements a downgrade. Financial implosion followed.